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With whom do children remain in divorce? Minor children after divorce

Everything good, unfortunately, ever comes to an end. It hurts when it comes to understanding in some families. When parents quarrel and do not find a common language, the young children suffer first. After all, they are born of love, on which family relationships were built. When for many reasons a husband and wife cease to be close and dear, one must break the bonds of marriage. But what are the small children to blame for? They did not quarrel with either mom or dad. How can they be in this situation?

With whom do children remain in divorce? Minor children after divorce

In order not to cause a psychological trauma to the child, parents should never try to adjust it against each other. If possible, it does not need to interfere in their adult problems, regardless of who is right, who is to blame. With whom children remain in divorce, it is necessary to solve them peacefully, because they, unlike adults, will also love mother and father after the divorce proceedings .

How to make the right decision

In most cases, the divorced child remains with the mother, so it is customary in the countries of the former Union. Ideally, if the ex-husband helps children and maintains a warm relationship with the former family, he spends a lot of time with the children. But this does not always happen. Adults are so absorbed in resentment after parting that they often do not retreat in the struggle for primacy. Sometimes, tormenting a child, they make you choose between them, forgetting that he loves both mom and dad. But no matter how difficult it is to decide with whom children remain in divorce, the most proper course will be the conduct of peace talks.

To resolve the dispute peacefully

Despite the spoiled relationship between the spouses, they need to make every effort and calmly deal with their rights to the child. It is very important to reach a peace agreement so that young children do not become victims of divorce.

Sometimes it can be to the detriment of one's own interests, but this is done for the normal upbringing and development of children. If both parents are not against discussing with whom the children will remain after the divorce, then the following questions should be solved, and possibly, to write a contract in writing.

  • Who will the child live with and where?
  • Material security: in what amount does maintenance of the second parent pay for maintenance?
  • Where will mom or dad be with the child, how often? It is necessary to draw up a certain schedule, to which children and parents can easily adapt.
  • Obligations of non-material nature also take place for discussion: who will take the child to mugs, take them out of the kindergarten, go to school meetings and much more.

It's very cool when a divorce with underage children is held with a compromise, when the former spouses do not make claims and, in spite of everything, trust each other with the upbringing of children and are taught to respect both parents.

It is advisable to apply to the court

When, for some reason, parents fail to reach a common agreement, and they can not decide when to divorce, with whom children should stay, then one must resort to court assistance. This is the right decision, because often the inadequacy of one of the parents is affected. For example, a mother does not allow her father to see a child, although he regularly pays alimony, and the child is attached to him and suffers. Or, on the contrary, the husband uses force, leaves the son or daughter to himself, expels the mother from co-habitation with nothing. There can be as many situations as there are divorces, they all have different ways, and many know this firsthand.

The court will take into account all the arguments concerning many factors of further education of children, and a decision has been passed that will be hard to challenge. In some cases this may be the only way for the parent to communicate with the child

Sometimes a child wants to stay with a dad

Children at the age of 10 years have the right to choose themselves, the court takes into account who they want to live with. Thus, both parents have the same privileges for the right to raise children. But the court does not take into account those situations when the child's desire is contrary to his own interests. Sometimes when a divorced child is left with his father, especially when the baby is attached to him more than the mother.

Due to the fact that one has to work hard, fathers usually do not give much time to raising their children. But this does not mean that the son or daughter does not want to be with the pope, so the latter is recommended to devote more time to communicate with them. A mother of her daily care is always closer to the child, because it was she who gave birth and raised it. Therefore, the preference of the judiciary is usually on the side of the mother, although the law says that parents have the same rights.

If the former wife turned out to be a bad mother

But sometimes "and at the old woman there is a rupture." There are women who shirk their parental responsibilities, there are many such facts in our country. It happens that after a divorce, the mother does not cope with the children entrusted to her, as expected, and even worse, begins to abuse alcohol and behave immorally. A former husband may not like this, he then has the right to take the children to himself, by providing evidence to the executive that his ex-wife is a bad mother. The court can quite satisfy the claim of the father for definition of a place of residing of the child.

To do this, in addition to the court with a statement of claim, you must provide information about the housing, the location of the nearest school, the availability of necessary knowledge of parental responsibilities.

How does the law work? When you divorce with whom are the children?

When a court decides on a decision, first of all, how much the child is attached to each parent is taken into account. The presence of other children, whether there is attachment, personal characteristics of both parents, marital status, living conditions and other circumstances for revealing the general picture are considered. This is necessary to make the right decision.

In order to seek help from a court, it is necessary for both parties to provide as many facts as possible about the fact that it is more comfortable with the given parent. Data will be requested from the place of work, feedback from neighbors, information on the existence of living conditions for the minor. It will be necessary to indicate who lives together with the parent in the house. But not only material and living conditions are taken into account in court. They are not always the main, though on the side of the one who really values his child.

How is the court session guided?

The court protects the rights of the child and the interests of minor citizens. To do this, carefully weighed all the pros and cons, it is determined with which of the parents the baby will be more comfortable. Evaluation of all criteria occurs exclusively in the aggregate.

The age group of children is considered, and if a woman with an infant or a child under five is the initiator of the divorce, then most likely the court will leave the mother the right to live with the children. In the case when the child at the time of divorce has reached the age of ten, his desire to be with one of the parents will be taken into account, but within reasonable limits. To adolescents aged 16 years, the court listens more, as they are considered quite independent and able to make the right decision. Attachment to parents plays a big role in this choice.

The moral development of children depends on the moral qualities of each of the parents. Therefore, the court also takes into account the lifestyle and harmful habits of both former spouses. Parents with a criminal record, unemployed, abusing alcohol, will not be able to arrange a trial in their favor, the decision is most likely not on their side.

However, the court also takes into account the schedule of work, and the employment of the parent, because it is important how long he can spend with his son or daughter. That is, people who are prosperous in material terms can remain with nothing because of high employment at work and the inability to give children proper attention.

Former children do not exist

Whichever reason for the divorce, no matter what the boiling point, the disputes between the former spouses may come, under no circumstances should children be involved in scandals. It is necessary to fight for the right to be with your baby, but at the same time you need to show the child respect in relation to the former second half.

There is also a category of parents who do not care who the children are with when they divorce. They are generally not interested in their upbringing for years. Such fathers, according to statistics, are much more than mothers. No wonder they say that while the father loves the mother, then the children are important, and when another family appears, interest in education and communication with the child disappears. In our country, there is no serious punishment for evading parental responsibilities and non-payment of alimony, but this is a completely different topic.

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