The crisis of adolescence and how to cope with it?

Teens have a unique feature - they do not tend to trust words. They prefer to check everything on their own, which can sometimes lead to sad consequences. When a child is experiencing a crisis of adolescence, he communicates predominantly with his peers, and parents are not able to control his actions. In the overwhelming majority of cases, adolescents do not listen to the older generation, but most often do everything in defiance. Sometimes adults do not even know what their child is doing.

Statistics are quite sad: many children between the ages of 12 and 15 die on construction sites, find themselves under the wheels of cars or drown. They tend to ride on the roofs of electric trains, cling to buses, jump from a height, perform rash things on a dispute. Irrelevant actions and decisions can affect the future fate of the child, which is why it is very important for parents not to miss the moment of transition. In addition, the adolescent crisis is often accompanied by a first love, which, as a rule, is emotional and sensitive. Such strong and vivid feelings sometimes lead to suicides (when love turns out to be non-reciprocal or when the relationship for some reason ceases). From the side of adults, love at an early age is just a temporary phenomenon, but the child's eyes do not just look serious, but vital. The teenager seems that he will not have another love, so if the relationship does not add up (and especially if they are complicated by the betrayal of a partner), then further life loses all meaning.

In addition, during adolescence , the formation of personality and social position takes place, which remain for the rest of their lives. It is from the transitional period, including from the parental attitude to all changes, will depend on how the future destiny of the person will develop: the child will be a leader or remain an ordinary person.

If we compare the crisis of adolescence with all other crises, then it has the property of developing slowly and incrementally. The child gradually becomes disobedient and defiant. That is why it is quite difficult for parents to replace that facet after which a son or daughter turns from obedient into an unmanageable one. The first sign is the demonstration of its independence. This phenomenon can manifest itself in completely different ways. The child may not attend school, not spend the night at home, close in his room and even sometimes becomes a member of secret organizations and sects. All adult advice and recommendations do not have the slightest importance. The crisis of teenagers is accompanied by excessive sensitivity. The child is very worried about the changes in his body (breaking voice in boys, signs of puberty and problem skin and hair).

That's why the carrot and stick method is simply unacceptable. Insolence and rudeness is an attempt at contact with adults and a peculiar disguise of insecurity and confusion, and this is not as bad as it might seem at first glance. Everything is much worse if the child does not want to talk at all. Even a negative attitude is already some kind of interaction and an attempt to report their problems. Do not be afraid and worry, the crisis of adolescence - a natural phenomenon that plays an important role in the formation of the individual. All parents must be prepared to survive this period of the child's life, and with the least loss. The main weapon is patience, understanding and no forceful methods, despite the insults and pain that the child's ill-considered behavior can cause.

If you look at the side of psychology, then the teenager is much more frightened by his condition than his parents. After all, he completely does not understand what is happening to him. Parents are entrusted with important functions: they, as owners of great experience, should prepare and make maximum efforts to ensure that the crisis of adolescence is the beginning for a successful and happy life in the future. Prepare to be worth since birth. From the first days of life it is worthwhile to build relationships based on love, trust and mutual understanding. You need to be not only a guardian, but also a friend who will always help and prompt you. From the first days of the kindergarten and ending with the last day of the school, it is worth talking to the child. Postpone the work and all the cases, because if the key moment is missed, then nothing will be done. It is necessary to take direct part in the life of the child. Be aware of the events and know all his friends. Learn about the problems and feel sad, learn about the victories and rejoice. Do not treat teenagers as children, show that you perceive the child as an independent person with the right to defend their opinion, no matter how wrong it was. With a sharp change in behavior, do not try to climb with advice, it can only hurt. It is worth studying the situation, chatting with friends and only then proceeding to action. Follow the basic rule of parenthood - love the child, whatever it is, and treat everything with understanding. Do not forget that compromise is the best way to resolve all conflicts. Only then all negative will go in the other direction, leading to leadership positions. The crisis of adolescence with the right approach can become a period of greatest closeness with the child. You can direct all actions in the necessary direction, however it is not necessary to solve all independently. The success of the relationship lies in mutual assistance and mutual understanding.