Self improvementPsychology

Life lost its meaning - what to do, how to live on? Psychologist's advice

Every person has a sense of life. His search is traditionally defined as a spiritual and philosophical problem, the essence of which tends to define the purpose of existence of each of us. If we think more globally, then to the destiny of all mankind. It is important. And if life has lost its meaning, then it is unlikely that something worse will happen already.

About the problem

This usually happens during depression. Although most often it is the loss of the meaning of life that causes this condition. During which you do not want anything. A person is depressed, he does not experience joy, does not show interest in anything, constantly feels tired. His speeches are pessimistic, he does not want and can not concentrate, sometimes he thinks about death or suicide, constantly sleeps or does not do it at all. And most importantly, it is a feeling of uselessness, accompanied by a sense of fear, anxiety and even guilt.

Life has lost its meaning ... How much pain in this phrase. And what is the reason for this problem? With a lack of what a person needs most. For some, it's a job and an opportunity to make a dizzying career. For others - a loved one, a joint pastime, tender feelings and passion. For the rest - a family with a bunch of children. For someone else, the meaning of life is immense wealth. For others - the opportunity to travel and develop. Examples can be an infinite number. But it all boils down to one simple truth. Fortunately. Yes, this is the meaning of life - to be happy. Or, as they say, to be in a state of complete satisfaction with the conditions of their existence and being. That is the meaning of life. This phenomenon, by the way, is actively studied by occultism, theology, psychology and philosophy.

Perpetual search

The paradox, but many people understand that life lost its meaning during ... attempts to find it. Such cases are not uncommon. And indeed, people who constantly think about what the meaning of life is, are the most unhappy. They actively try to learn their desires, their own character and themselves. And many are not satisfied with the notorious answer to the eternal question, which assures that the meaning lies in happiness.

And then a person tries to find him in esoteric, philosophical and religious teachings, which, of course, do not give a clear answer to this question. Therefore, a person begins to search for it in music, literature, lyric poetry and even natural sciences.

And in the vast majority of cases, disappointment comes to him. He, like, has everything you need for a full life: work, close people, friends, the other half, the salary is not bad. But this does not make sense anymore. Because the person was assured: everything is decay. And slowly, but surely he loses interest in everything. Begins to experience headaches, struggles with insomnia, experiences chronic fatigue. And so it's very difficult to live. Attempts to distract begin. In the best cases, a person is fond of computer games. In the worst - drown in alcohol and drugs. The most serious consequence is suicide. In general, the real depression.

What to do?

If life has lost its meaning, then you do not want to do anything. For the first time, a turning point, so to speak, it is permissible. But then you need to act. Either himself, or by filing someone close and indifferent. Many people turn to psychologists. Of course, there are effective tips. But the universal recommendation, which equally helps everyone, does not exist.

So what if you lost the meaning of life? Start looking for answers. To begin with, it is important to determine what is happening. After all, the essence is not just in a bad mood, parting with a loved one or accumulated fatigue. Losing the meaning of life can not be compared with any sadness.

And we need to remember that all of us are driven by desires. And they must be satisfied. What could be worse than not wanting? If you do not satisfy your own spiritual needs, you can not avoid misfortune. And emptiness, which must be filled. To start gradually getting rid of hatred of yourself and your body, your surroundings and the world as a whole, you need to remember what a person has always wanted. Let's take, for example, a trip to sunny Dominican Republic, to the gentle sea. Through force you need to catch fire with this desire. Start planning a trip, collect things, pick up a hotel. There is a saying: "Appetite comes with eating." And in this case, too. A person will be inspired in the process. And the result will be the satisfaction of his main desire, which entails a sense of realization, self-sufficiency and pleasure.

Analysis

Everyone knows that this is a method of research, in which the studied object is divided into separate parts for better understanding. The analysis is relevant not only to mathematics, programming and medicine. But also to the topic under discussion. What if I lost the meaning of life? Analyze the current situation.

We need to evaluate our actions and identify mistakes. Nothing just happens that way. And the reason for which the person was on the brink, too, has roots. But most importantly - in no case can you condemn yourself. Everything has already happened. What was then passed. And now we need to find out why all this happened so as not to repeat our mistakes in the future.

It is very important not to feel regret. This is a bad feeling, once again depressing a person. He must accept the moment as it is. And even in the most terrible, wild situation, try to find pros. At least that life goes on. And in the future there is a chance to succeed.

And even if a person has an incredibly hard life, a story about which can cause tears in the most stale man in the universe, you do not need to feel sorry for yourself for a long time. Yes, everything collapsed. It's already bottom, there's nowhere else to drop. Therefore it is necessary to rise. With difficulty, through pain and anguish. It can help to realize that the perception of everything around is just a matter of tuning. Yes, it is easier to argue than to experience everything, but the person himself will come to such a conclusion when he gets out of a deplorable state.

Emotion ejection

If a person overcomes the question "Why should I live?", It's time to get a nice clean notebook with a pen and turn it into a diary. This is a very powerful technique. And you can not underestimate it.

"And what should I write in it?" - languidly, but with a skepticism will ask a depressed person. And the answer is simple - everything. Absolutely anything. Thoughts can begin with any phrases and expressions - you do not need to structure and organize them, because this is not an essay. A diary is a way to throw out your emotions. As a rule, a person who constantly asks "Why do I live?" Does not want to get in touch with anyone. And emotions accumulate. So it's better to reflect them on paper. Over time, it will become a habit. And then the person will notice that in the head, as well as on paper, there is already no such confusion, which was observed at the very beginning.

And then in the diary you can start to celebrate the results of your work on yourself. Does someone prevent to sketch a little plan for the future?

By the way, when you feel better, you need to find something to do. No wonder they say that a person is alive, while he is interested in living. You need to find a hobby that would not only bring pleasure, but still inspire at least a minimum of optimism and joy. Maybe start breeding parakeets? It will be a great idea, because everyone knows that our smaller brothers give unlimited positive, joy and help pass the life tests. After all, they love their master unlimitedly. And love gives us strength.

For whom should we live?

People, having fallen into powerlessness and tired of looking for the reasons why they were on the verge, begin to ask themselves this question. Find the cause from the outside, so to speak. Some through the force begin to live for a loved one, parents, pet or children. Maybe it helps. But the key word combination here is "through force." Because the problem, something that touches a person directly and in the most direct way, remains unresolved.

You need to live for yourself. Selfishly? By no means. And even if yes - in a healthy, productive egoism there is nothing wrong. You need to stop thinking about what can be done for others. And, finally, put yourself in first place.

By the way, often the cause of deep depression lies precisely in this. The fact that a person has never lived for himself. He acted as usual. I did what I had to do. I tried to meet the expectations of the parents or the boss. Tried to conform to generally accepted standards, so that "everything is like people's." Although in the depths of my heart I wanted something completely different. And the realization of this usually comes at a time when it stands on the edge. But do not despair. We must remember - there is enough time for everything that really wants to be in time. This is true. Because desires always subordinate their time. And we do not need to wait - we need to start implementing them right away. And then the questions about why life lost its meaning will go to the background.

Forget about everything

This is another effective method. He is able to help. Anyone - whether it's a man drowning in depression, or a woman who lost all sense in life. The advice of a psychologist is this: you need to ignore the past. Forget him. To throw out of memory forever. The past often pulls a person down, like a stone to the bottom of the river, attached to the foot of a drowned man.

You need to burn all the bridges. Break off contacts with unpleasant people with whom a person was forced to communicate. To quit my hated work. Oppressed the boss? So you can finally and tell him in the eyes of all that has accumulated in the shower. Divorce the legitimate "second half", to establish a life with which there is no chance. Move from a bored and hated city to another place. In general, we are talking about the beginning of a really new life. The one that everyone is so fond of talking about today.

And that's the most important thing: with the accomplishment of every action a person must pass through himself the realization that he is becoming a new person. Not what he was. You can even fix it with visualization - change the appearance (haircut, hair color and contact lenses, image, tan, etc.). All this can be taken lightly by some people. But, again, it seems so from the outside. After doing all of the above, a person will look around, look at himself in the mirror, and understand - he is already different. And he has no right to return to the old life.

Break

When thoughts like "What do I do?" And "What am I doing with my life begin to appear in my head," it's time to pause. Desirable long. To completely not get bogged down in depression and not to fall into the real depression, we must urgently take a vacation, rent a house by the lake or in the forest and go there. A sudden change in the situation and unity with nature saved a considerable number of people.

What after? Then you will need to give yourself answers to the notorious questions "What do I do?" And "What am I doing with my life?". To realize what exactly is causing discomfort. Why there is discontent and when these questions, in fact, appeared. And after - find solutions to problems. Maybe find a new meaning of life. As a rule, people who took a break on time and sorted out with the start of the accumulation of oppression, do not reach the edge and do not fall into a deep depression.

By the way, the break does not do without planning the near future and setting goals. They, like the meaning of life, should be for every normal person who wants to be a person. Goals do not necessarily have to be global (buy a villa in Spain, change from "Lada" to "Mercedes", do investment business, etc.). They should be feasible. And those for whose sake I would like to wake up in the morning. It is desirable that the goals were long-term. Three is enough. It is better to write them down in the notorious diary. It might look like this: "Goal 1: save for a year to rest in Greece. No. 2: Every morning, do a 5-minute charge. No. 3: tighten the English language to a conversational level. " Goals should be motivated and tuned to positive life changes. This is the main principle of their production.

Help your neighbor

It is not easy for a person who is on the edge. But the depressed state experienced by him affects also people close to him who are beginning to wonder: how to help a person who has lost the meaning of life?

That's a very difficult question. There is no universal answer. Everything depends on individual psychological characteristics. What will help one, can not bring out another person from depression.

One can state with certainty. The chance to help a person is in someone who knows him well. A person who is well acquainted with the specific characteristics of his loved one can guess approximately what actions should be taken to make it easier. The main thing is to avoid standards, which usually do not show anything except indifference, even if a person really wanted to help. These are phrases like "Everything will be fine", "Do not worry, life will be fine", "Just forget it!", Etc. You need to forget about them. A person faces a problem: the meaning of life is lost, how to live on? About any "Just forget it!" Can not go on.

So what should I do? To begin with - just come to a person. A simple "How are you?" May well make him want to share. But not psychological "Do you want to talk about this?". It is necessary to avoid pressure and do everything that usually raises the mood. If, of course, he does not drive the well-wisher. In this case, you do not need to take offense - it's bad for him, the turning point has not yet passed (if it does not work for a long time, unfortunately, you'll have to see a doctor for antidepressants).

So, you can quietly include his favorite music or TV series, bring his beloved food and drinks, start talking about the most interesting topic for him. Little things? Perhaps, but they are at least a bit, so help restore a person the taste of life.

The technique of the last day of life

This is the last thing I'd like to talk about. When a person is depressed and does not see any sense in his existence, he will not stop thinking: what if this day of life was the last? The thought of the soon disappearance of all reality will cheer everyone up. Of course, when a person is alive and well, he has enough time for depression, sadness and despondency. It sounds exaggerated, but it's true. But he has to think about the fact that he has only 24 hours left - everything acquires a different meaning, not to mention the fact that there is a rethinking of values.

And when there is no desire to exist, it is worth using this technique. Live the current day as the last. Perhaps, after this, the desire to exist will flare up again.

Losing the meaning of life is the worst thing that can happen. And it would be better if no one passed through it. But in any case, the most important thing is to hope for the best in the depths of our hearts. And act. After all, as the great American writer Jack London said: "A man is given one life, so why not live it properly?"

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