Perhaps, everyone once asked himself: what does a person need for happiness? A lot of money, a successful career, excellent study ... and a family, children, a big house and a dog. Or health, a sober husband, a faithful wife? And maybe a little bit of everything? Or just a lot? Here it turns out that there is no single formula for happiness. Everyone will see in him something of his own, sore, that is what he lacks in this period of his life.
Happiness is not in money?
Joke about the fact that happiness is in money or not in them, a lot has been invented. Of course, money is easier with money, but is it happier? How many examples of strange entertainment rich people, their craving for adrenaline, danger, prohibition. And all from the feeling of satiety, when the earned (or inherited) money is enough for any whims. There is nowhere to strive, there is nothing to be achieved - it is boring. On the other hand, the situation "from salary to pay" does not attract a cloudless existence. So how much money is needed for happiness? Perhaps, nevertheless, not at all, and to be more precise, a sense of happiness with money if it is connected, then indirectly. And a lot of films on this subject have been shot, and books have been written, and the real life constantly casts examples. Then involuntarily on mind and comes a saying about paradise and hut.
Happiness - in love, family, children?
Perhaps, this postulate is the most common among people. And this is not even accidental, because the needs for procreation, for belonging to someone (read: in the family) are basic. Well, women's nature demands that there be a spouse, children. It turns out, their presence in life should already make people happy? No, no, it's not so simple here. About treason, domestic violence, quarrels, scandals, disappointment, crises of family life and can not speak. But there are still single by nature, although according to their statistics and not more than three percent. And there are those who knowingly do not want to have children - childfree. But is it worth saying that they are unhappy? Of course not! Rather, the presence of a couple and / or children will be perceived by them as a threat to a cloudless existence. It turns out that there is no single recipe for happiness .
The main thing - health?
So maybe what you need for happiness - is it great feeling? After all, they say: there would be health, everything else will follow. But how then to be with people with disabilities? Among them there are successful professionals, happy mothers, fathers, beloved spouses. And older people who have lost their health, a priori, go to the category of unhappy? But this is not so! There are those who, in deep old age, feel happy and die with a smile on their lips.
So it turns out, each of the "components" of cloudless life necessarily has some "but". In this case, what is needed for happiness? Or maybe it is not at all? Rather, happiness lies in harmony. Between our desires, possibilities, emotions. At the moment when this harmony comes, a person feels happy. But as soon as the balance disappears, the feeling of happiness is lost. It is in our head, in invented, and sometimes contrived complexes, desires, dreams. Feel our happiness, our fears, anxieties, hyperactivity, the desire to catch up everywhere and everywhere. Often he is hampered by a self-imposed sense of guilt when a person puts himself "blocks". "I am guilty, do I have the right to be happy after this? No! "- Subconsciously (and sometimes deliberately) we deduce, and do not allow ourselves to smile, love, be loved, happy. A kind of voluntary masochism.
Therefore, the first thing you need for happiness is to stop taking self-interest. As pathetic and banal as it may sound, happiness is really in us. If a person likes to feel unhappy - he will be just like that, no matter what others do or say, whatever happens in his life. But nothing can prevent him and the opposite.
Secondly, you need to set yourself real goals. For example, if you convince yourself that for happiness you need a cup of coffee in the morning, most likely, you will really feel the inner harmony, sipping an invigorating drink for breakfast. But if you are sure that what is needed for happiness is to be born in a family of wealthy parents or, for example, to get the moon from the sky - then you will feel unhappy that you will be unaware of the dream. And it's not that desires should be more mundane. Rather more adequate and achievable.
In the end, a person is indeed a blacksmith of his personal happiness. It is, and this fact is beyond doubt. However, what you need for happiness, everyone defines himself. The main thing, in pursuit of it, do not forget that happiness should not be the ultimate goal (what we aspire to), but the process itself (what is happening to us).