Self improvementPsychology

Is the problem of fathers and children obsolete today? A look from the psychological point of view

Is the problem of fathers and children obsolete today? The answer is definitely not. After all, fathers and children - this is always a topical issue, which began not with Turgenev, and the end and the edge of which can not be seen. In this article, we will look at the relationships of different generations today, how to solve emerging problems, and so on.

The eternal problem of generations

How often do we hear that "it used to be better" or "that's in my time ..."? At least one of these phrases is invariably (and some even incessantly) uttered by hundreds and thousands of thousands of representatives of each new generation. What is significant, the saying O tempora! O mores! ("On the Times! On Manners!") Appeared in the 1st century BC. E., He said Cicero in his accusatory speech. So many millennia have passed, and it is still remembered, and moreover - it is still relevant.

Based on this, is it possible to positively answer the question, is the problem of fathers and children outdated today? It is unlikely that the answer will ever be yes.

Reflection in art

For centuries, the theme of the relationship between fathers and children has been reflected in art. So, the already mentioned phrase in his "Woe from Wit" was used by Griboedov (therefore it was attributed to him for a long time). But the most telling work, which is recalled immediately when the question is asked is whether the problem of fathers and children is outdated today is the same name written by Turgenev. It, certainly, "Fathers and children".

Psychological point of view

But, despite the fact that you can philosophize philosophically as much as you like, sometimes the problem is put very sharply and concretely. And then it may even be necessary to consult a family psychologist - in the quality of conflict prevention or the solution of existing ones. They just the same arise on the basis of misunderstanding of fathers by children and vice versa.

Statistics

According to statistics, the problem of fathers and children today is as follows: almost eighty-five percent of quarrels grow into serious clashes requiring professional intervention. The remaining fifteen percent also do not do without periodic conflicts.

Confrontation

The elder, of course, must be respected. Especially the parents, to whom children owe their life, upbringing and comfort. Nevertheless, it is the inertial control of the "fathers" that does not give a negative answer to the question whether the problem of fathers and children is outdated today.

Influence can grow into an almost imposition of one's thoughts and interests.

Children do not remain in debt - trying to show their "adulthood."

Psychology of Generations

Different psychology implies a completely different way of social and domestic life. This means that it is difficult for parents, and they do not need (in their opinion) to change themselves for a child, given that they, as adults and people who have already taken place, already know how to live. But children aspire to be themselves, not copies of their mothers and dads. The older they become, the more it is manifested.

Stages and ages

When children are still very young, all their discontent is expressed mainly in vagaries and crying. At this time, parents have a fairly large sphere of influence and control. But not all of them are able to accept the fact that gradually it is weakening more and more. Peak tension reaches at the point of transitional age, the "uncontrollable teenager."

Forms of conflict

It's hard to even say that it's worse - an open form, that is, constant screaming, quarrels, almost fights, or closed, passive, in which, however, the tension builds up and grows. After all, in essence, both the first and the second can reach the stage when the consultation of the family psychologist becomes necessary.

What determines the types and forms of misunderstanding between fathers and children? This is influenced by the characters, temperaments, individual personality traits.

Three Generations Converged

Of course, when they talk about fathers and children, they literally represent parents and those very notorious difficult teenagers. But the essence of the problem of generations is that each of them is different from the other - the grown up children are even more incapable of getting along with their moms and dads and should start an adult life. And grandmothers and grandfathers always have their own way, however hospitable they may be. This is psychology, embedded in the subconscious. Often, because the divorce is due to the fact that the newlyweds did not have their own apartment, and therefore they decided to huddle with their parents.

Variety of reasons

The urgency of the problem does not go away, but the reasons for which it arises, and after them it is necessary to improve the methods. But the main key to solving misunderstanding is always one - to respect each other, to accept what we are, to be able to put ourselves in another place. This must be remembered as a younger generation, rebellious, violent, impetuous, and older, held, judicious, firm in their decisions. After all, everyone was once a child, and everyone will once become an adult.

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