Outward decency, external conditional decency, decorum

A connoisseur of human psychology, witty Goethe in one phrase derived a formula that meets the principles of external decency: "The most immoral and dissolute people on this planet look so decent that they can now be printed on Christmas cards." This is the whole of Goethe, but this completely explains the need for an external gloss - to cover up the gentleness of not too attractive soul features.

What is true and ostentatious decency?

But before stamping, analyzing someone's behavior, we'll figure out what decency is, as it is. Guides on "How to be a good boy" since the time of Alexander I was published a lot. What is worth only the "Rules of courtesy and decency", published in 1819 in albums for noble noble children.

The word "decorum" was then not in use, but its meaning was quite understandable and fit into the concept of hypocrisy. Contributed to the maintenance of sensitivity in high society, the so-called "Georges" and swindlers, who wore gold charms on watch chains and ranged in manto. To distinguish a true lady or a nobleman from a penguin in peacock feathers could only be by behavior in society. Even with observance of the external conditional propriety, the clumsy impudence or lackey servility of commoners or poorly educated offspring from the "middle strata" issued them with a head.

German writer of the late XIX century, Lyon Feuchtwanger on this topic expressed a hint: "Of all the vices, decency is the most ruinous." Indeed, the maintenance of a life style that does not meet the inner essence, the burden is sometimes disproportionate. Kant indirectly agrees with this proposition, noting that every decency is nothing more than a beautiful appearance.

Leaving a stilted syllable, we explain that decency in its primary meaning is not even belonging to the higher world, although it was more convenient for it to settle down there. It is nothing more than ordinary decency. Appearance ostentatious, respectively, can manifest itself in any society.

The rules of decency in the judgments of the high society

Both external decency and internal require the application of certain efforts and constant control. They do not respond to the spirit of fanfare, but, on the contrary, they call for moderation of desires, modesty of judgments and caution in pleasures.

In the light of ideal understanding, a decent person should possess the following qualities:

• A sound judgment that regulates not only thoughts and words, but actions and reactions to the actions of other people;
• High morality and honest conduct;
• Compliance with ethical standards and the society in which it is located;
• Tolerant attitude towards others, the ability not to notice someone else's mistake, if it is not offensive;
• Preservation of personal dignity in any situation;
• The desire to help others without claiming compensation for personal inconveniences, wasting or possible sacrifice on their part.

The same Goethe, arguing about the moral side of the question, reasonably notes that external decorum should be justified.

The rules of decency in the Encyclopedia of Life

"The Encyclopedia of Life" of 1992 edition does not add much to the above, but let's get acquainted with the rules of propriety, set out by our compatriots relatively recently. So, to observe decency, then:

• Keep in accordance with their position;
• Respectfully treat others;
• Do not show gaiety when addressing people who have reason to be sad;
• Do not show a proud appearance;
• Do not interrupt in conversation the interlocutor, there and then - not to represent from itself a source of verbosity;
• Do not force anyone to accept your point of view, but stand up for justice in terms that are not offensive to others;
• Do not whisper a tete-a-tete in the company of other people;
• Do not put your own person on the topic;
• Do not make an enforced appearance during a conversation, find the strength to apologize and leave the interlocutor if you need to absent yourself.

Decent thief

Known swindler Sonka the Golden Pen was an unsurpassed master of adventure, while unfortunate victims until the very last minute thought they were dealing with a lady of the highest degree of decency. The woman was very educated, learned five languages easily and had an attractive appearance of an innocent girl.

All successful large passages performed by Sonya kept on the extraordinary ability of this brilliant thief to play their external decorum, departing from the canons of decency with such grace as if it were a matter of minor "accidental" circumstances.

Citing Sophia Bluewstein as an example , we can speak, rather, about the phenomenon of rare plasticity. Possessing entirely the art of observing decency, an exemplary noble lady, this actress in life is yet another confirmation of Charles Colton's words: "Women do not as often as men violate the laws of decency, but if they have to transgress, they go much further in this respect" .

How to understand the decency in Germany

A decent German does not confuse personal life with a public one, that is why it is not customary for them to discuss the family at work, and the working questions in the family circle. You will not hear from a familiar German referring to "you" even after a few months of friendly communication, since even a change in the phase of communication among these sensible people is slow and accordingly a balanced decision.

One should not fall into the trap of decency and decency, ask the German about his affairs and show sincere interest in the question, because otherwise you are threatened with a lengthy and thorough conversation about all the problems, news, epidemics and everything else that is indirect or Directly touched this Herr.

The Germans surprisingly sensitive to the demonstrative external decency and the associated deception, so if you do not want to be beyond the friendship of one of them, do not try to try on someone else's image.

Decency in English

Decency in England - this is not an external manifestation and not the result of self-control, this is the quality of the character, formed from childhood. Diplomacy is the main quality of the Englishman, so you can speak with him for an hour and take out of the conversation extremely accurate information about the weather, about courses on the exchange, but not about what you wanted to know.

In general, in properly conducted conversation, a decent Englishman will certainly mention the weather ten times during a conversation. This may seem strange, but it is thanks to this alternative topic that a properly educated Briton will not allow you to feel an awkward pause or get lost in the search for a topic.

In England, not in the process of physical contact while communicating - to say hello to the hand, holding the palm of the interlocutor in his, is considered the height of impropriety. It is also unreasonable in conversation with a true British to demand from him specifics, if it is obvious that he is trying to avoid it.