Self improvementPsychology

How to get rid of social phobia?

If you are afraid that everyone around you will judge you, if you constantly focus on how things can go wrong, or you just sit for hours after the party and think about all the little things that you said without thinking, you can suffer From social phobia - a disorder associated with a sense of anxiety from any social interactions. This problem is the largest in the field of mental health, for example, in North America. About 15 million Americans suffer from social phobia in one form or another. A slight anxiety before public speaking is normal, but not when your personality suffers. That's what you can do to overcome it.

Counterattack

Do not succumb to social phobia! Instead, acknowledge the problem and say: "Hey, internal fear, I'm making decisions here." Whatever you can counter with your problem, you should do it. Every time you reflect an attack of fear, you reprogram your brain and reduce the power of the problem over yourself. Sociopathy, which is not paid attention, can lead to alcohol abuse, depression, loneliness, slowing of professional growth and the growing likelihood that you will not get friends or a partner. So it is impossible to live! And that's why you need to feel your fear and meet him face to face. You have to understand that you can live your own life even when something scares you, but nothing bad will happen.

Unfold

Many studies demonstrate that treatment methods for anxiety disorders, involving the disclosure of a patient, are the most successful. People tend to avoid what they fear, and as a result they are afraid of what they avoid. To break this vicious circle, you need to open up before your biggest fears. Write down on paper situations that cause fear in you, in order of increasing anxiety. Create in real life a situation that is the first on your list, and then move gradually from the safest to the worst situations. Your hierarchy can begin with knowing the passer-by where the object is located, and ending with asking the boss for an increase. And the way your boss reacts to your request does not matter. The important thing is that you took a step. Sociopathy requires that you be quiet and calm, and you need to outwit it.

Pretend to be a reporter

If you have nothing to say in society, you should learn to ask questions, as they will be an excellent helper for you. Ask questions that require a detailed answer, such as, for example, "How did you meet him?" Or you can ask in parallel: "Has anyone seen a good film?". Ask questions about the answers given to you to make the conversation deeper. Questions about where you can pour yourself a drink, where to go to the toilet and when the party ends, are not considered.

Let yourself relax

The more you worry and allow anxiety to rule your life, the more you set your mind to worry and anxiety and the more you associate your anxiety with specific places and events. You should try a visualization technique to ease anxiety. Create a mental picture of relaxation. It can be a sunset on the beach, trees that swing under a light breeze, leaves slowly falling in your yard. It can be a rhythmic rocking of a hammock under the blue sky and chirping of birds in the background. When you visualize relaxation, try to involve as many sensory organs as possible. How does this place smell? What do you hear? Do this daily until it becomes as natural as using a smartphone.

Try breathing techniques

Try special breathing techniques, which are taught in yoga classes. These are techniques related to ayurvedic medicine that bring the mind and body into a state of calm and neutrality. For decades, these techniques have been used by leading athletes around the world to relieve stress and anxiety. Close one nostril with your finger, exhale through the open nostril, and then inhale through it. After each breath, change the nostril. If you notice that it's easier for you to breathe through one nostril than through the other, do not panic, it's normal.

Get a mantra

The use of self-confidence in reality gives a real result. You should choose a mantra, slogan or quatrain that you can read in your head to prepare for an event, a performance or just to go to a party quietly. You can take any line that seems right for you. It can be both psalms from the Bible, and the song of a metal band. You should remember that waiting for an exciting event is usually much worse than the event itself.

Silence the inner voice

Inside you, most likely, there is a constant voice, which inspires fear and doubt in you. You should fight the negative statements of your inner voice with truth, that is, with statements such as "you are more than able to cope with the coming event," "there are a lot of reasons why everything will turn out well" and "you are competent, experienced and deserve what you say, to be happy". There are four kinds of questions that you can ask yourself if you feel the approach of a fit of fear. What evidence exists for the validity of such thoughts? Are there other ways to look at this situation? Is this situation really as bad as it seems? What can be done to solve the problem or feel better?

Stop caring about what others think

Sociopathy is directly related to the judgments of others. However, the truth is that all judgments and opinions of other people have nothing to do with you and your values and talents. Treatment of anxiety disorders involves the recognition of their own shortcomings, as well as the rejection of the need for approval from external sources. Being a perfectionist is great, but in real life it's impossible. In most cases, people overestimate how much and how bad other people think about them, which leads to the fact that they become more depressed and less impulsive and happy.

Reward yourself

Instead of chastising yourself for all the slightest mistakes after social interactions, you should reward yourself. Naturally, not with the help of alcohol or new tattoos. You should at least praise yourself for the fact that you got courage and attended the party, met face to face with your fear. Every time you counter with your fears, you reduce their impact on you, gaining courage, to again enter the ring with them. You regain control over your life time after time. You deserve praise, and you will be more motivated next time.

Call the doctor

If social phobia prevents you from living a normal life, you should call the doctor and arrange a visit, as, most likely, you need professional help. Sociopathy manifests itself slowly, gradually and imperceptibly, just like thinning hair. Cognitive-behavioral therapy is one of the most effective ways of treating it, unlike self-medication, which is not.

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