How to deal with resentment and negative emotions?

Resentment is something that persecutes every person almost daily. All people are constantly offended by someone or are offending someone. However, everyone is so used to treating the offense as something ordinary, that they do not notice how much damage it does to each of the participants. It can have serious consequences in the future, so you should think about how to cope with the insult. After all, it depends on you, how much this or that case will affect your psyche. And if you can not overcome the feelings that are gnawing at you on your own, this article will offer you several ways to fight offense. Study them, choose the ones that suit you best, try them separately or in combinations. It is very important to learn how to cope with the insult. Quite quickly you will understand: without it your life is much better.

Resentment: how to deal with it

So, in this article you will learn how to deal with the insult. However, for this you need to understand what it is and why it manifests itself. Resentment is a feeling that a person experiences when they say or do something unpleasant. However, it has differences from anger and other manifestations of negative emotions. Most often it is hidden, that is, a person feels that he is uncomfortable, but does not tell the one who offended him. It is because of this that problems arise. The fact is that offenses have the property of accumulating, and also an even more dangerous property - to grow. If someone has offended you, it is best to solve the situation as soon as possible, because the more offense you will "ripen" inside of you, the worse it will be for you. The person who gave you this unpleasant feeling may not even know about it. But at the same time you have already touched hundreds of situations in your head and inflated your grievance to unprecedented proportions. Although everything could start with any little things.

The thing is that resentment is a manifestation of the inner child within each of the people. You can be twenty-five or fifty years old, yet in your heart of hearts you still have a part of the child's ego. And because of this there is an irrational reaction to the saying or action of a person. The insult lies inside the person and does not go outside. And this can cause serious damage to your mental health. If you will accumulate grievances and do not learn to cope with them, then this can seriously affect your condition. That's why you need to learn how to deal with the insult. And this article will help you in this.

Conversation

The first thing you need to understand, if you want to learn how to cope with feelings of resentment, is that the person who offended you, can not read minds. Often he can not know that you did not like what he said or did. Therefore, first of all you need to try to suppress the childish ego in at least a little way, to make room for rational thinking. How can a person feel guilty if he does not know that he is being blamed? Naturally, he will not come to you to ask for forgiveness, since he has no idea that he should do it. Therefore, you should definitely talk to this person. Tell him that you are offended by his specific remark and behavior. In most cases this works without fail. The person who has offended you, if you approach him calmly, and not with accusations in the forehead, will also look at the situation from a rational point of view and will understand what exactly he did wrong. This is the simplest way of coping with the insult to a person. However, there are other methods that someone may find more convenient or effective. They can also be used when the first method did not work.

Forgiveness

Very many women are wondering how to cope with the resentment of a man. After all, if you are in a relationship, then, most likely, the first method does not always work - you know each other too well that one of you remains unaware of the fact that he offended his partner. This method, which will be described now, is suitable not only for this case - you can use it in any situation in life. Its essence lies in its simplest forgiveness. When you take offense at a person, you harm mostly only yourself, so you should learn to forgive offenses without the involvement of the other party. Instead of keeping an insult inside yourself, forgive the person who offended you. Naturally, if he continues to do this further, then he will have to take other actions, but if this is an isolated case, forgiveness may be the best option. So, if you are interested in how to deal with the insult to your husband, you definitely should try to just forgive him, since you do not have to forget that he is the person closest to you in the world.

Lesson

If you are wondering how to deal with resentment and anger, then you most likely did not try to look a little deeper inside yourself. Often, even from resentment, you can endure anything positive. If you are offended, you can ease your suffering by engaging in introspection. Think about what caused such strong feelings. Most likely, a person touched you for something that is very important for you - what is it? Reflect on this and try to draw conclusions from this. As you can see, from any situation you can endure and something positive that can help you in later life.

Understanding

When you think about how to cope with a bad mood, irritation, resentment, you most often think only of yourself. This is a normal trait for humans, but sometimes it is worth looking a little further than your own self. Almost always, offense is perceived as a personal insult, and rare people immediately begin to think logically and assume that the case, perhaps, is not at all in themselves. Sometimes, someone may offend you by chance because of a bad mood, something has happened in the family or some important plans for him have broken. And you just fell under the hot hand. So do not be offended, because a person in a few hours can already get back to normal and forget about how he told you something, and you will still be offended at him. Try to understand people around you, as often you will be in their place and you will most likely want to be understood, too, and not immediately severely judged.

Analysis

This paragraph is a kind of combination of the previous part, because in it you will be asked to analyze the situation. If you want to learn how to cope with resentment and negative emotions, you need to think soberly and not succumb to the manifestations of acute feelings. Analyze the situation: if an unfamiliar person has offended you, which you most likely will never see again, then you should not even think about this offense at all. Forget about it and do not ever remember that it does not stop you from living. If the offense was inflicted by someone close and this happened not for the first time, then we will have to use other measures. Just remember that in this situation, your main weapon is a calm conversation, rather than harsh accusations.

Expectations

Very often it happens that the resentment arises from the fact that a person simply did not live up to your expectations. You meant that he would act in a certain way, since you are friends, colleagues, relatives, and so on, and he acted quite differently, and for this you are offended by him. If you soberly look at this situation from the side, you will realize that this is stupid and irrational. It was already written above that no one is able to read your thoughts, so you should either disclose them, or do not demand that a person perform what he does not consider necessary. If you think that your friend should help you in a particular situation, tell him about it or just forget and do not expect from him what he did not intend to do and is not going to.

NLP

There is such a technique as neurolinguistic programming, abbreviated NLP. With its help, the most difficult problems that people face are often solved, and it also allows for coping with grievances. One of the most striking examples is the burning of a leaf with insults. You need to write down on the sheet of paper all the grievances that a person has inflicted on you, throw out all your emotions on paper, then burn this sheet, imagining how they burn in the fire. It looks rather strange, but in fact it turns out to be an extremely effective method. You program yourself for your happiness, and listing grievances and burning leaves is just a symbol that allows you to maximally simply convince yourself that you are the master of your happiness.

Another option

NLP has become increasingly popular, so this article will show one more method that relates to this technique. You need to write on paper the name of your abuser and what exactly he did to you. After that, you need to write that you forgive him for it. Repeat this several dozen times a day, until your grievance is gone, because you are constantly repeating the action program yourself to forgive. Naturally, this approach should be used only if you can not forgive a person without any outside help.

Steam production

Well, one more option that will allow you to forget the insult and cheer yourself up is to let off steam. If you have a punching bag, well, if not, take a pillow or something like that. Well, then everyone understands what to do: imagine that this is your abuser, and release the steam on it. Naturally, such an approach is recommended to use for unfamiliar or not the closest people, such as, for example, the boss, not the mother or husband.