How to part in an amicable way and not burn bridges

Tears, hysterics, screams, slamming doors and trying to regain a feeling that's gone, often desperate and dangerous. Is not it true that it is with this that we are associated with a break in relations? However, we are not obligated to behave like heroes of melodramas or romantic tragedies, to cut veins, to jump from the balcony and burn all bridges. Wise people know how to part in an amicable way, so as not to poison a life to themselves, neither the former nor those around them.

Cold calculation here will help and will act immediately. Especially when one of the partners is still hoping for a return. However, even for those who are waiting and believing in the resurrection of feelings, you should think about yourself and your needs. The old technique of pros and cons and then tell you how to part in an amicable way. First, evaluate life with him / her and without. It can not be that in everything at parting, there were only gloomy sides.

For example, in the pluses you can bring the fact that from now on you will not have to cook his favorite dish, which you can not stand, or walk with her around the boutiques to the loss of the pulse in search of "that, I do not know what." In the past, there will be clarification of relations, and stormy scenes of jealousy. Secondly, you can estimate the gap itself. Divide the sheet into two parts. First write down what you get, if you do not give a divorce, do not let or will prevent your partner from leaving and starting your life. The second part is how your relationship can look, if you can live this period with minimal losses. Is friendship possible between you? And maybe, to the former one, you can ask for help and support more than once? Or you just will be interested from time to time to meet and talk about life. If you were together, then something positive was in fact in a relationship. How to know if these moments will acquire a new meaning and quality if we give each other respite and freedom?

But how to part in an amicable way, if everything in you turns from pain and anger? Perhaps, in this case, without the help of a psychologist or a family therapist can not cope. After all, assess the pros and cons is one thing, but to learn how to manage emotions, often very strong, sharp - it's completely different. For those who are afraid, or who are very difficult to make possible frequent meetings with the "former half," a reasonable decision may be to leave. Not necessarily in search of a way, how best to part with a guy, move to another city or country. Perhaps even a short trip and the distance dividing you will do their job. Emotions will settle down, they will be replaced by new impressions. Both sides will have time to think and rethink what happened before.

In the West and in America, besides the help of psychologists and lawyers, there are agencies that organize the "holidays of divorce." And it makes sense. After all, when marrying or long-term union, people mark both the event itself and different dates important for two. And when the gap does not end life, and a new stage begins. He can become more joyful and optimistic. And if you know how good it is to part with a guy or a girl, kindly, not with curses and accusations, but with the wish of the brightest, life will not become poor, but, on the contrary, you will acquire a true friend. Trust is essential for this. Often breaks are unprepared, sharp, painful. But if both are looking for ways how to part in a good way, then the conversation about what they managed to do during the relationship, what good and bright they brought to your life, why it did not work out and how the couple plans to continue to communicate, can become an important moment. Not the culmination of a tragedy, but a step in a new quality. Remember, as the poet said: "So God grant you a beloved to be different." Let us strive for mutual understanding and trust. Be happy!