Anniversary of death: how to remember a person?

The anniversary of death is a mourning date, during which relatives and friends gather behind a memorial meal. It is an opportunity to recall the good deeds and touching moments of the deceased's life, share his feelings, express his condolences.

A narrow circle marks the anniversary of death. How to remember, Whom to invite, what menu to make - organizational moments worry the family of the deceased. By the acts of charity, by prayers, by visiting the cemetery, one should honor the memory of the deceased.

The history of the commemoration days

A commemoration (or remembrance, remembrance) is a ritual in memory of a deceased person. Usually a funeral is held by relatives, if there are none, close people, friends.

The tradition of commemoration arose in connection with the Christian teaching. In every religion there are rites of remembrance of people. Adapted popular consciousness often unites several beliefs in one ritual.

Christian traditions are fundamental in Russia. Nevertheless, according to Orthodox rules (with funeral commemorations, prayers), only people who have passed the baptismal ceremony are commemorated. The exception is suicide, unbaptized, non-Orthodox, heretics - for them the church does not pray.

Dates of Remembrance

In Orthodoxy, a wake after death is spent 3 times. On the third day after death, on the ninth, fortieth. The essence of the ritual is a memorial meal. Relatives and acquaintances gather at a common table. They remember the deceased, his good deeds, the stories from life. Dishes from the memorial table are distributed to friends, acquaintances, colleagues of the deceased, so that they remember it.

On the day of the funeral, all those who wish to honor the memory of the deceased are gathered. The Christian is first taken to the funeral service for the church or chapel of the cemetery. The uninjured deceased, after parting with the house, are immediately taken to the cemetery. The burial takes place according to the traditions of the region in which the person lived. Then everyone who wishes returns to the house for a wake.

On the ninth day after death, the memory of the departed is commemorated only by close relatives. Wake-ups resemble a family dinner, with the difference that the photo of the deceased is not far from the refectory table. Next to the picture of the deceased put a glass of water or vodka, a slice of bread. This is a pagan tradition, unacceptable for Christians.

On the 40th day everyone is invited. On this day, usually at a wake, those who could not attend the funeral come.

Then comes the anniversary of death. How to remember, Whom to invite - the relatives of the deceased decide. Usually they call on the anniversary of the death of their closest friends and relatives.

Christian traditions of commemoration

According to the Christian faith, commemoration on the third day after death takes place in honor of the resurrection of Christ (3 days after the execution). On the 9th day - in honor of the angelic ranks who ask the Lord for pardon of the deceased. On the 40th day - in honor of the Lord's ascension.

Church tradition says that the soul from the day of death is in wanderings. Until 40 days, she prepares for the solution of God. The first 3 days after death, the soul visits places of earthly life, close people. Then she flies around the paradise monasteries from 3 to 9 days. Then he sees the torment of sinners in hell from the 9th to the 40th day.

The decision of God takes place on the 40th day. A directive is issued about where the soul will be before the Last Judgment.

The beginning of a new, eternal life is the anniversary of death. How to remember Deceased, who to invite, what to order - these are important organizational issues. By the day of remembrance, it is necessary to prepare in advance.

Anniversary of death: how to commemorate

The mourning date is reported only to those whom the deceased's family wishes to see on the days. It should be the closest and dearest people, friends of the deceased. It is necessary to clarify who will be able to come. Knowing the number of guests will help to make a correct menu. In case of unforeseen arrival of someone from friends - portioned dishes to make 1-2 more.

On the anniversary of death, you should come to the cemetery, visit the grave of the deceased. After that all relatives, relatives are invited to a memorial dinner. It should be noted that the days of commemoration are at the discretion of the family of the deceased. The subsequent discussions of strangers about the correctness of the ritual are inappropriate.

The anniversary of death is approaching. How to remember how to set the table? It is important to note that it is convenient to hold such events in small cafes. This will relieve the owners of the exhausting preparation of various dishes and subsequent appliances in the apartment.

Christians order special memorial services in the church. It is necessary to discuss in advance with the priest all the activities that need to be carried out. You can confine yourself to the home reading of the akathists, memorial prayers, invite the father to the house.

Whom to invite?

In a close family circle there is a commemoration, the anniversary of death. How to remember whom to call Agreed by relatives in advance. It is customary to invite only those whom you want to see for an hour.

Unwanted visitors may unexpectedly arrive on the anniversary of death. The family of the deceased must decide - leave the unwanted guest for a memorial dinner or not invite to the table at all. The anniversary of death is an event only for the closest people.

It is not necessary to arrange a crowded crowd. Mourning date, the memory of the deceased is not a reason for a noisy party. A modest family dinner, warm memories of the deceased - this is the anniversary of death. How to remember - decide next of kin of the deceased. Unhurried, calm atmosphere, quiet music, photos of the deceased - a worthy way to honor memory.

How correctly to dress?

Clothing for the anniversary of death is of no small importance. If a trip to the cemetery is planned before the funeral dinner, weather conditions should be taken into account. To attend the church, women need to prepare a headdress (scarf).

All funeral arrangements should be dressed strictly. The shorts, deep decollete, bows and ruches will not look right. Bright, colorful colors are better to exclude. Business, office suits, closed shoes, strict dresses of muffled tones are a relevant choice for a mourning date.

How to remember the anniversary of death? Kind memories in a close circle. You can give alms - pies, sweets, things of the deceased.

Visit to the cemetery

You must visit the cemetery at the time. If the weather conditions do not allow (heavy rain, snowstorm), this can be done on another day. At the cemetery you should come in the first half of the day.

The grave of the deceased must be watched. Timely paint the fence, you can put a small table and bench. Plant flowers, weed out unnecessary weeds, which give the grave a neglected appearance. This is the anniversary of death ... How to remember a person? Tidy up on his grave, light candles in special glasses, lay flowers.

According to Christian traditions, the synod banned wreaths with inscriptions from fake colors in the 19th century. Such assignments distract from prayers about the soul of the deceased.

You can bring tea, alcohol, pies, sweets with you to the grave. Modestly to remember the deceased, pour the remains of alcohol on the grave, pour the crumbs - this is a symbol of the presence of the deceased next to the living. Such a pagan tradition at the wake is held by many families.

In Christianity, it is forbidden to bring anything to the grave. Only alive flowers and prayers should remember the deceased.

How to lay the table

Table setting for a wake is standard. The only difference is to put an even number of dishes on the table. Plugs for mourning dates are usually excluded. Such a moment in the year remains at the discretion of the family of the deceased.

Dishes, in addition to the obligatory on the memorial table, are prepared in accordance with the preferences of the deceased. To the interior you can add funeral tapes, light candles.

For orthodox - to consecrate kutya in the church. To exclude alcohol, to adhere to fast and fast days - from them to be repelled at drawing up of the menu. Pay more attention not to food, but to prayers for the deceased.

Menu on the anniversary of death

Like the usual funeral commemoration is the anniversary of death. How to remember what to cook? Mandatory are considered on the memorial table kissel, kutya, pancakes. The symbol of Christianity are fish dishes - these can be pies, cold snacks, smoked products.

From salads it is possible to prepare a vinaigrette, a beet with garlic, a vegetable caviar. Serve sauerkraut, marinated cucumbers and mushrooms. Sandwiches with sprats, baked cheese. Meat and cheese sliced.

For hot dishes fried or baked chicken (rabbit, goose, duck, turkey) is suitable. Cutlets or steaks, meat in French or chop, stuffed vegetables or braised lamb. For garnish - boiled potatoes, vegetable stew, fried eggplant.

In the form of dessert - gingerbread, sweet pies, pancakes, cheesecakes, sweets, fruits and apples. Drinks - purchased juices or cooked at home compote, jelly, lemonade.

Exclude from the menu sparkling and sweet wines, as it is not a cheerful holiday, but death anniversary. How to remember? Give preference to strong drinks (vodka, cognac, whiskey), dry red wines. During the drinking conversation it is customary to remember the deceased, his good deeds on earth.

Wake at the cafe

To exclude bulk purchases of food, cooking, table setting and subsequent appliances - you can order a small room in the cafe. So that in a peaceful atmosphere the anniversary of death passed. How to remember what to order - Help staff cafe. Their menu is not much different from home.

It is necessary to warn in advance the employees of the cafe that the guests will gather at the wake. The administrator will try to keep too funny visitors as far as possible from the relatives of the deceased (if it is a question of the general hall).

Usually it is customary to order a small banquet hall. Then the holiday-minded neighbors will not prevent the quiet mood of the anniversary of death.

If you do not like a cafe, but want a cozy, home environment - you can order dinner at your house. Coordinate the advance menu, set the time and address of delivery.

Anniversary of death: how to commemorate the church

According to Christian beliefs, the duty of the living - he prays for the deceased. Then the most serious sins can be forgiven. Church funeral services are called upon to ask for the forgiveness of the sins of the departed. Not only on the days of commemoration, but also on ordinary days, you can order a Panikhida.

During the Divine Liturgy, prayers for the deceased are heard. Immediately before the Liturgy (or in advance, in the evening) a note is sent in which the names of the deceased Christians are inscribed. During the Liturgy, all names are voiced.

You can order a forty-forty-year old for the deceased. This is a commemoration for 40 days before the Liturgy. Sorokoust ordered and for a longer period - a commemoration for six months or a year.

The usual candle on the repose of the soul is also a memory of the deceased. In domestic prayers you can remember the deceased. There is a special book of the Christian - a memorial place where the names of the deceased should be inscribed.

While visiting the cemetery, Christians read the Akathist, perform the lithium (it is also performed before the memorial dinner, for which the priest is invited).

Giving alms

On remembrance days, attention should be paid to charity. Memorial dishes can be given to those in need, friends, colleagues. This is done so that as many people as possible remember the deceased with a kind word.

A good occasion for alms is the anniversary of death. How to remember the deceased? You can give money, sweets, cookies to beggars at the church and ask them to pray for the deceased, to donate money for the construction of the temple. Needy acquaintances usually give things to the deceased.

Almsgiving is a good deed in relation to the indigent. Therefore, the family of the deceased need not give away food, money to the poor at the church. You can find people (pensioners, families with many children) in your environment who will be interested in real help. Or take a small offering to the nursing home, boarding school, orphanage.

The order of the anniversary of death

1. To notify in advance about the approaching of the mourning date, to invite relatives and friends of the deceased.
2. Choose a cafe or organize an event at home.
3. Visit the cemetery, the grave of the deceased.
4. A memorial dinner honoring the memory of the deceased.
5. Give alms to the needy.