A man lives at the expense of a woman: a norm or a nonsense?

Couples, in which a man lives at the expense of a woman, are by now rare. For many people with stereotypical thinking or with the views of the old school, this causes bewilderment. And contempt for the man. He is immediately called Alfonso, not having understood the situation. But is it really so? Of course no.

A look at the situation

So, there is a couple in which a man lives at the expense of a woman. Is this normal? First, it concerns only them - the direct participants in the relationship. Secondly, yes, normal. After all, if they are together, then they are all satisfied with both!

Of course, there are situations where a man simply sits on the neck of a woman, legs are hanging down, and she simply can not understand this state of affairs, which is completely uncomfortable for her, because of her love for him and because of her weak-willed nature.

But in that case, you just need to become stiffer. Do not like the layout? Do not be silent about it. Many such women regret. But in fact, in fact, if they allow you to sit on your neck, it's their choice.

And now look at the other side. Many believe that when a man lives at the expense of a woman, it is ugly. Furthermore! They say: "This is not a man." And what if you look at it just like a human being? Ignoring the floor? Does it characterize a person, whoever he was (a man or a woman) on the positive side of the fact that he allows himself to live at someone's expense, spending money earned by someone else's labor? Few people approach this issue from this side, and in vain.

The Partnership

Not always a man wants to live at the expense of a woman - it's just that sometimes it happens. Left without a job, for example. The source of income was gone, but the needs remained. And suitable vacancies are zero. He just has to live on the money of his lover.

In this case, the overwhelming majority of men purely humanly take responsibility for the performance of all other concerns that the woman previously dealt with. Thus, the life of a beloved is greatly facilitated. She earns, and her man helps in everything else. This is called the division of labor. And if everyone is satisfied with such a situation, then why, strictly speaking, not?

Playing with feelings

Well, these were all life situations. Now we should talk about the notorious alfonso. What are the names of men living at the expense of women? Exactly. Although the word has a very deep concept.

Alphonse - it's scammers, scammers. And they act according to a very sophisticated scheme, playing on women's feelings and emotions, which is very mean.

First, such a man is rubbed into trust. Behaves like an ideal - listens attentively to the interlocutor, shows interest in her and her stories, showered with unannounced compliments, notes all of her raisins, supports her point of view. So gigolo probes the soil - makes up the psychological portrait of the lady, and also finds out the level of her wealth and the degree of credulity.

Extension of money

With closeness, he pulls, and not because he appreciates the girl's feelings. He just takes her on the leash. Although he does not mind visiting - to assess the situation, housing, values. Then gigol begins to talk about himself more often - about his life, problems, troubles, hard past. And as if by accident. And so it goes on quite a long time. While at one point he, lamenting that he would never ask for such a dear and beloved person, hints at the lady of the heart for a large loan.

Most women, after hearing a heart-rending story, sprinkled with a ton of problems (invented, of course), lend money to someone they really love. And he took the amount, dissolves, leaving the next used lady with a broken heart and an empty wallet.

However, there is a second option. Alphonse simply becomes a man living at the expense of a woman, - goes to her full support. And that she did not mention that she does not quite like it, constantly feeds promises and showering compliments. How long this will last depends on the patience of the woman. However, everything can stop when Alfonso finds a more prosperous object.

Other signs of gigolo

This topic is actively discussed in psychology. A man lives at the expense of a woman in some cases, and they have already been described. Now it is worth noting the attention to a few signs by which it can be recognized.

He does not invest in his woman, but at the same time uses its resources. A man can live in a beloved's apartment and ride in her car, but at the same time buy food in the house, give her gifts, pay for tickets to the gym, etc. Is not it? So, he is interested not in the woman, but in her resources.

He is actively interested in the work and connections of his lady. A man asks someone to introduce him to someone, to introduce a certain circle of respected persons? It is possible that the woman's capabilities are important to him, and not herself. For the sake of experiment, it is worth refusing the request. Responding calmly - it means that there was no self-interest in his words, he simply considered it a convenient thought and decided to voice it.

He asks for money. This is the most obvious. It is worthwhile, even if he lends money. Although they, as a rule, do not return. It is worth trying to start refusing. If the interest of a man to a woman will go out, you can be sure, he is already looking for a more prosperous option.

Opinion of psychologists

Finally, it should be noted with attention. Psychologists believe that if a man lives at the expense of a woman and openly takes money from her, sooner or later it will affect sex. Why? Because money is energy. Force. And it attracts. A man takes money from his lady, without earning at the same time? Hence, he automatically makes of his woman a source of energy and strength. And she, without understanding herself, trying on the role of men.

After a while, a woman begins to feel it. She feels like a leader, a boss, a boss. And not only in life - in bed, too. She ceases to feel tender and fragile. He no longer feels the need for care, love and protection. She ceases to be a woman next to her man, begins to realize this fact. And in the end he asks himself: what is the meaning of this relationship in general?