RelationsFriendship

How to break off friendship with a girlfriend: 10 tips

The sages say: nothing lasts forever under the Moon. Unfortunately, this statement is also relevant in relation to the brightest phenomena in our life. Even friendship is not an exception to the rule. At some point in your life, you feel that an old friend, with whom you had to go through "fire, water and copper pipes," became a "toxic" person, and now she spreads a solid negative around you. People change, and you including. Probably, before you could close your eyes to some of the disadvantages of a friend, but now her life principles are unacceptable to you. If you no longer feel happiness while being near this person, we advise you to put an end to such relations.

Recognition will be cruel

If you are planning to end a close relationship with your girlfriend, know that this does not seem to break the relationship with the young man. Your friend knows too much about you, you are accustomed to trusting her with the most intimate. And now you are standing on the verge of a difficult choice: what if the end of friendship turns into a hound for you? Here are some steps that will make your life easier.

Do not hold onto your friendship out of habit

Sometimes people hold on to friendships, outlived themselves, out of habit. However, staying inside such a stagnant model can turn into an emotional catastrophe for you. Very soon you will feel embarrassment, guilt and the feeling that another person can use you.

Weigh the meaning of relations

According to psychologists, friendship is divided into different categories, some of which are considered more important. Friends of childhood and former classmates are with you, having a common history. Also there is a circle of persons with whom you communicate as necessary (neighbors, colleagues). There are so-called "superficial social friends" with whom you spend a certain amount of time. But there are people who stand apart. It's about friends that make you grow and move forward. You want these people to be there when you are in a difficult life situation. Most of the friendly relations can be stopped, gradually bringing to naught communication. But with the representatives of the category of "friends of growth" parting is much harder.

Solution

When parting with a close friend, you should not use confrontation. Do not you like her attitude to you? Then create clear boundaries around yourself. If the girlfriend continues to cross the line and aspires to go too far, let her know that this is unacceptable for you. The basis of any strong connection is respect. When there is no such thing between people, the connection collapses.

Private conversation

Explain to your friend that you do not exclude communication with her in the framework of public events. In fact, it is transferred from the category of "friends of growth" to the category of "superficial social connections". Recognize that you can not devote as much time to it as you have been dedicating, because certain changes have taken place in your life. The need for a personal conversation can fall away if the girlfriend is also on the verge of big changes (for example, plans to move to another city or get married). In this case, communication between you can in itself smoothly come to naught.

Telephone conversation

The best option is to end the friendship in a personal conversation. But sometimes the opportunity to meet face to face is missing. If you are an emotional person and are not sure that you can control the situation, then call your girlfriend and tell them about your intentions by phone.

Be gentle

Try to completely neutralize the negative. When you use negative communication, you risk hurting another person for months and even years ahead. Your friendship may end, but the ex-girlfriend still deserves courtesy from your side.

Forget the guilt

If you feel guilty for initiating the termination of a relationship, know that you should not do this. Friends can pull you down for various reasons. And the more you are with them, the more painful will be the separation. Sometimes you have to put your own interests first. It will be better for each of the parties.

Allow yourself to mourn

If you are the initiator of the gap, this does not mean that you are not hurt. Allow yourself to cry and mourn for the completion of the next stage in your life.

Write down your feelings

This trick will help to cope with the emotions that flood you. Write three letters to your ex-girlfriend. In the first you express all sore emotions, in the second, softer in content, use more compassion and less negative. In the third, admit your mistakes, which led to a break.

These letters do not need to be sent, but they can become a bold point in these relationships.

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